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October 23, 1999

A Bean in Every Pot

The topic for the day is beans. This food has a bad reputation in human circles, some human circles. I have a theory about the unpopularity of beans. I believe it is a recent phenomena in our history.

Lets take Cowboys for example. These hardy fellows worked hard in the great outdoors. During their travels they often slept under the stars or under wagons. Their environment was one of open spaces and ventilation. Did Cowboys eat beans? You bet they did! Read one of those Cowboy novels and just see if you catch a Cowboy complaining about the improprieties of beans. Not a mention, not a peep. I'll bet you've never heard of the horses complaining either.

Which leads me to propose my profound theory on bean consumption in the urban environment. Our perception of beans as a foodstuff is a direct consequence of our habit of working and living in small enclosed cubicles with poor ventilation. If it weren't for architectural fashions most urban citizens might be able to enjoy beans with impunity, at least during warm weather.

I often ask myself why I think about such things. In this case, I think about beans because I like them and I don't work outdoors. This creates problems in my life. For instance, it is safe to eat beans on Friday nights because I don't work on weekends. This means that I am free to roam the great outdoors on Saturday and Sunday. Lots of exercise and nutritious food (low fat, low cholesterol, low sodium, high fiber, the list goes on) is a great combination. I owe it all to beans.

As a matter of fact I have a rather large pot of beans soaking in the the kitchen right now, it is going to be a grand weekend!