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A Woman's Journal

To Much to Choose From

By Maggie Turner

December 18, 1999

Too Much to Choose From

The Christmas tree is up and decorated! "The Teenager" commandeered the job of decorating the tree this year, reminding Attila and I just how difficult it is to be a teenager. Realizing that our presence in the room invited complaint, the adults abandoned the project and escaped to the pleasantries of dishes and floor washing. From the monologue that emanated from the living room we surmised that the project was going badly. We decided to do the laundry in the basement. When we heard "The Teenager" retreat to her room we ventured into the living room. The tree looks wonderful! "The Teenager" has gone out with her friends. Life is good.

Attila's mother keeps Christmas well. Each year she bakes the same assortment of "Cookies" and they arrive in a box with the presents the week before Christmas. Opening the box is always an event. Out will come the brightly wrapped presents and out will come all the wonderful little packages of "Cookies". In our first year together Attila's mother did not know about my food allergies. I couldn't eat the cookies she sent. At first I watched Attila eat the cookies; I drooled. Finally I couldn't stand it anymore and the cookies were hidden in Attila's studio never to been again. The following year almost all the "Cookies" were allergen free, I was ecstatic.

The box arrived yesterday afternoon. I waited until evening to let "The Teenager" open it. The "Cookies" had arrived! I decided we would wait till Christmas to eat them; it was a very mature decision. Yesterday evening we settled down for a long winter's night in front of the TV and I experienced a serious case of regression. I could not concentrate on the program, my mind constantly wandered over to the "Cookies". "Ok," I thought, "I'll just think of some other treat and I'll leave those "Cookies" for Christmas." I considered chocolate bars and potatoes chips and nachos. But no, they would not do! Not so easily distracted, my mind returned again and again to the "Cookies". And so we ate the "Cookies". It had to happen. We did leave some for Christmas. It could happen.

I've been wondering about what people think as they fall asleep. The source of my curiosity is my own pre-slumber thoughts. Last night as I was falling asleep my thoughts were of colors and shapes, matching and fitting together. The source of my profound vision is the jigsaw puzzle Attila and completed just minutes ago. There are good puzzles; there are bad puzzles. This puzzle was great, as puzzles go. Satisfying thick puzzle pieces, a pleasant, varied and detailed image and a kaleidoscope of bright colors. Thoughts like these ensure sleep.

This evening we discovered an airing of the movie "The Black Stallion". What visual beauty! The dialogue is minimal; for the longest time there isn't any dialogue at all, just music and movement. Usually I dislike background music in a program or movie; this movie is an exception. The first part of the movie shows only a black stallion, a boy and a beach. It is a love story. We have seen this movie before and are enjoying it just as much the second time around. Kids-without-attitude like the one in this movie really appeal to me, unless of course I am the kid.