Sitting here in front of the keyboard, it occurred to me that this computer is almost an antique. Purchased in the spring of 2001, it has only had one problem and that was fixed within a few days at no cost, as it was covered under the warranty. So for almost seven years this electronic extension of my social existence has been chugging along day after day after day. This is quite impressive when you think about it.

Of course, I make backups regularly, because this computer may decide to retire at any time, as is her prerogative.

I have spent the past week educating myself about the labeling laws in relation to drugs and my allergen. It was exhausting, following up every lead, cold calling government agencies, university professors, clinics and non-profit organizations. Most helpful were the government agencies, federal, who not only offered sound and reliable information on the telephone; they followed up our conversations by sending me email messages with additional information and links to pertinent online versions of Acts and Regulations.

While on this journey of discovery, I also found information that saddened me considerably but will allow me to move on. There is no safe test that can be administered to determine the extent of my allergy, because I have already experienced anaphylaxis. I have held on the fantasy that someday I might be tested and discover the allergy had disappeared. This will not happen. There is closure here. The clinic that I had hoped would help me determine the extent of the problem has replied with a definitive decision that testing is not going to take place. They are going to do what they can for me, and are sending me a custom package of information about drugs and my allergen. This should help me in my struggle to survive.

The days of research have paid off in that I now have the exact name of a freezing that the dentist can use while filling my teeth. The assistant at the dentist office found information online, but I urged him to continue his research. It turned out that the list of ingredients in drugs that you find on the federal government site and on some of the “med” sites LISTS ONLY THE ACTIVE INGREDIENTS. My allergen is a preservative and therefore NOT LISTED. These online lists are not meant to be used in situations where allergens are being considered. The Internet is not a definitive source of information and relying on it exclusively would be most unwise.

The dentist did fix my broken tooth last week without any freezing. I will say that even though the tooth was “dead” due to a root canal, the procedure did involve a considerable amount of pain. I felt sorry for the dentist and the assistant as they had to soldier on with the procedure despite the very obvious fact that I was experiencing considerable pain. We got through it though, and by dinnertime I was a right as rain and my tooth has been fine ever since.

Sad news, an old friend passed away last Sunday night. Norm Hacking was a very talented singer/songwriter based in Toronto, Ontario. For my part, although his musical talent was impressive, his tender heart and personal integrity were his greatest gifts to the world. Norm will be missed by many.

Glad news, this past week friends have been in touch. An email missive from England started a conversation with Annie, which helped me see myself more clearly. Annie is a gem, she doesn’t shy away from hearing the raw side of life, and she doesn’t shy away from telling you exactly what she thinks of it all either. Honest feedback isn’t always what you want to hear, but it is frequently what you need to hear. Thank you Annie, for taking the risk and the time to be a true friend!

This morning the telephone rang, and I was delighted to hear Em on the other end of the line rather than the expected telemarketer. We talked for quite a while, catching up with each other’s news, offering encouragement. Now, Em and I are about as different as two women can be. But, we do have a few things in common, and those things happen to be strong elements of our character. When Em assures me something will be wonderful, that I know will not be wonderful at all, I know she is really saying she wants it to be wonderful, for my sake. That’s what she means and that is what I hear.